Monday, September 29, 2014
Our Little Evil Genius
-Cracked raw eggs on the counter and floor.
-Devoured bags of marshmallows or chocolate chips that were hidden in the highest kitchen cupboard.
-Dumped out 3/4 of a new shampoo bottle.
-Dumped out the nutmeg.
-Dumped out 1/2 the GrapeNuts box and a whole bag of Rice Krispies (I'm sensing a pattern - she likes to dump).
-Poured half the salt shaker in her spaghetti.
-Smeared paint all over her baby sister's standing saucer. And her baby sister.
-Colored with markers on the carpet, her sister's bed, herself, the table, the walls...need I go on?
-Oh oh, colored with Dry Erase Marker all over the computer screen and keyboard.
-Pooped on the curtains. Yes, the curtains.
-Pooped on the CD player. Yes, we still own a CD player. You have to put actual CDs in it.
-Pooped in a towel, wrapped it up and then slept on it (WHY WOULD ANYONE DO THAT???)
-Emptied all dresser drawers during most nap times.
-Made sure there was no longer anything hanging up in the closets.
-Repeatedly sprayed her baby sister in the face with a spray bottle.
-Escaped nap time to go wake the baby.
-Cleaned the bathroom by scrubbing everything within reach with toilet paper that she dipped in toilet water (this one's a favorite of hers. Can't tell you how many times she's done it)
-Smeared toothpaste all over the bathroom mirror.
-Put the puppy at the top of the slide.
-Painted her face with glitter nail polish right before church.
-Climbed displays, hid in toilet paper fortresses, and disappeared completely when our backs were turned at Walmart.
-Colored with permanent metallic marker on the chalkboard.
-Tormented her brother by stealing his favorite everything.
-Transferred all her food from her plate into her full water cup, skewered a whole apple with a fork and shoved said apple like a plunger into her cup again and again. And then tried to balance her plate on top.
I know that most kids do or have done these things at some point in time (or at least I tell myself that to feel better). It's just how many of them she manages to do in a single day that blows my mind. And ruins my house. To say nothing of my sanity! It's a phase, right?