As I was looking around the office this morning, I couldn't help but notice the the myriad of female coworkers standing on chairs underneath air-conditioning vents. Each was attempting to cover the vent above them as completely as possible with the thickest paper they could find. "It's so cold in here," they all explained to me. This as I remember how British Female Coworker who sits next to me used to have her desk equipped with a space heater.
This led me to contemplate a question that has been plaguing me for nearly two decades now: Why are women always cold?
In performing a google search on the subject, I was led to a site called Straight Dope. It's a useful site where, apparently, some guy named Cecil answers questions--what a crazy gimmick! Cecil the Omniscient offers these suggestions for why women always seem to be colder than men. I then offer my thoughts on the subject, as usual.
1) Women have less volume in relation to the surface area of their skin, and therefore shed heat quicker than men. This theory is supported by the fact that Coworker Balded is always complaining of being cold, despite the common consensus that he is a man--he has very little body volume. However, this theory is negated by the fact that I also have very little body volume but am rarely cold (by rarely I mean in the winter on a windy and twenty-degree day while riding my bike to campus without gloves), and that one or two of my female coworkers don't actually have much less volume than myself (that in no way means that they are large--I'm just not a particularly gigante fellow as was previously mentioned).
2) Men have more muscle mass, muscles have more blood vessels, more blood means more heat. In my personal case, this just makes sense. I can't argue with science.
3) Women have a higher vasoconstriction threshold temperature. Even after the paragraph explaining this theory I don't understand. I think my brain shuts off when it sees a pentasyllabic word (unless, of course, that word is pentasyllabic).
4) Women get colder during menstruation. I'm not even going to venture into this territory. However, it is highly unlikely that all female coworkers' bodies chose today to start doing their thing.
I have yet to hear a satisfactory answer to this question, but I do have a solution: men need to transfer excess body heat to women. Yes, cuddling is the only way for men and women to bridge the temperature gap. So c'mon, people, do something to better the condition of the world's inhabitants: grab a member of the opposite sex and get comfortable!
7 comments:
Maybe I'm not a real woman, because I am always hot and sweaty. Even in the middle of winter. My mom is the same way, so I guess we just have faulty genetics.
Well in my situation my significant other is ALWAYS significantly warmer than I am. She will make mention of being cold but to the touch she is VERY warm. I sometimes wonder if she's really some mutant fire-breather or something because I can feel her heat and not have to be in direct contact.
Foxy: You're a real woman, just a mutant one. And that's pretty cool. It's like you have special powers.
Red: So, you're a girl.
Women have to be colder most of the time, otherwise they'd spontaneously combust when they got pregnant and their body temperatures went up thirty degrees.
Um yeah. Except when I was a senior in HS, I was 6'0" 145 lbs. I hardly think anyone could stretch their surface area so dramatically.
Furthermore, sometimes I think it's because they can be ice queens and princess. They practically bleed liquid nitrogen sometimes.
PS I agree that a real woman sweats like a Kentucky iced tea.
Making a comment on your number 4. Women who spend a lot of time together...roommates, co-workers, best friends, etc. can and often do get on each others menstrual cycles. Is the office any more cranky than usual...lol, just kidding!!
it could be hundred degrees outside and the ac is pumping making everyone except the women in my office feel comfortable. they say they are cold! what do u do during the winter months? carry a heating pad around? and thy complain when the temp with the ac on is 70 DEGREES! i think women just always need to complain about something.
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